This is going to be a mushy post because Syed has recently posted something equally mushy to Hilyah and I have no brain of my own and have decided to copy him because Syed is the epitome of cOOl. That was sarcastic, of course.

[[ Angie Stone - Wish I didn't miss you ]]
This song's on repeat because it reminds me of him.


"I don't understand why you have to work so much. Can you not overwork yourself?"

"You know that I'm doing it for you, baby."

I hate it that he has to work. I miss him terribly and when I finally do have him during the day, he's so exhausted that I can't ask him to do anything without feeling guilty.

When we take the bus together to Tampines, we usually fall silent because he knows I get depressed at the thought of having to say goodbye. Then he plants the most tender of kisses against my forehead as if to say "It's all right, baby, you'll always have me."

And when it is finally time to say goodbye, he holds me tighter because he knows I get sad (and lonely!) at night without him.

This wednesday's our fourth month but we're not celebrating it because he'll be working. Plus, it's not like I'm loaded this month anyway. Where does all my money go? Cab fare? Cigarettes?

He wants us to go shopping for couple rings next month and we're probably going to get it engraved. He's got a makeshift ring from me but it's much too loose for his little finger and too tight for the rest of his fingers. He wanted to get me a diamond ring but I told him it wasn't practical.

Plus, I'd rather he spend the money when we go to KL. I think it's going to be fun. Unless we fight. Which is quite often but the making out up makes it fun anyway.

Priya (whom I went to for a tarot card reading) was right. I should appreciate the way he makes me happy instead of always comparing him to other guys and mulling over his faults.

Of course, Priya also said our relationship will still have a lot of ups and downs before it's smooth sailing but I think we're strong enough to handle any shit that comes our way now.

I can't eat, I can't sleep anymore,
Waiting for love to walk through the door,

I wish I didn't miss you anymore.
-Angie Stone "Wish I didn't miss you"

I love him and I'm going to stick it out. Because I know a love like this doesn't come by everyday and for once in my life, I'm going to do something right, damnit.

I'd rather have hard times together then have it easy apart
I'd rather have you hold my heart
- something he wrote for me a few months back

PS. Hello minahs, clubbing this wednesday, yes? Only clubs with ladies night please, I'll be on a tight budget for the rest of the month.